Bismillah...
Because he's from Yemen
because he lived in Egypt
Because he practices Islam
because he's a Muslim man
Because he chooses to practice Islam "here"
because he isn't like every other man (Western)
Because he does things differently
because he has an accent
Because we don't always see eye to eye
because he is protective of his children
Because his wife covers her body and her hair
because he is devoted to his parents
Because he doesn't chase other women
because he doesn't drink alcohol
Because he CAN"T look you in the eye and lie to you
because he would rather go home to his family at the end of the day
Because he is who he is...
he must be set in his culture.
he is a fanatic.
he is controlling.
he's a typical Middle eastern man.
he has no limits.
he is over-bearing and strict.
he doesn't know how to integrate.
he is selfish.
he's uneducated.
he is set in his ways.
he's weird
This is the message that I receive almost every day from people who know nothing about my husband. They don't know our relationship, or our hardships- but they know that...he's just not the right man for me. They do not hesitate to point out that he is different, and that someone as educated as I am should "never stand for that...".
Do you know what "THAT" is? THAT is covering my body. THAT is being a humble servant of Allah and serving my husband as an equal partner. THAT is preferring to stay at home with my kids and husband...cooking...baking...reading...laughing with them instead of hanging out about town.
THAT is being satisfied with what I have, because I know it actually isn't that much better out there. How dare I ask my husband if I can do something? Sometimes I tell him I will do something...YET, many times out of respect, out of compromise I ask...what's wrong with that? MARRIAGE IS NOT A FAIRY-TALE...IT IS NOT HOLLYWOOD (like those people even stay married). Gheesh!
IF I COMPLAIN then I could not ask anyone to keep his mouth shut, but no one has a right just to assume they know him, or the life I live. If my husband was from the West, and he reacted or acted in a certain way, I wonder what the argument would be. I wonder why anyone would put a person in a position to defend why she married or loves a good God-fearing man.
I'll tell you what...just to prove everyone right I will leave my husband. I will tell him that popular beliefs and ignorance means more to me than my marriage vows. I will throw away my memories, and my partner in sharing and maintaining a home. I will do that. Then what happens? Who will pay my bills? Who will tend to me when I am sick? Who will raise my children? Who will commit to honour and protect me? Who will help me strive in my deen? What kind of idiocy...
AND IT GETS WORSE...
I am sorry to say this BUT I MUST (I don't personally have anything against ANY race..I hate that word & worse, I hate what the idea of race stands for. I also have no intent to single out a group of people, BUT this is from my own personal experience and it is tiring).
From his end it is the same drama. He cannot meet enough Arabs who cannot understand why he married a Black woman...of all the women in the world. What makes Arab or Red people, or Blue People so much better? These people (these so-called fellow Muslims) are not nice people...they are not accepting of anything different from what they know. I know because I have had to deal with too many in my short time as a Muslim. Is it a few bad apples? Hmmm...
They pick and choose bits and pieces of the Holy Quran to fit their ideals. They will smile to your face and sneer behind your back. They will preach blah blah blah about this hadeeth and that ayat (so what????). They torment people with their negative outlook on life, and most of all they are masters in excluding people- the Prophet never did that. Didn't they read the Quran...didn't they take anything good from the Holy Book and the Prophet of Islam?
"O Mankind, we created you from a single pair of a male and a female, and made you in to tribes and nations so that you may know each other (not that you despise each other). Verily, the most honoured of you in the sight of Allah is he who is most righteous of you." (Al-Quran, Chapter 49, Verse 13).
Did they miss this memo? Ah, sure they must have. But they will preach about Holy war against these people and these ideals...pathetic. They ask for rights that they would not extend to ANYONE if he begged with his life. They backbite and are so darn fake. So much for Islam- so much for the so-called ummah.
The Prophet came and gave us a message about humanity... he told us that none had a right over another- not rich over poor or vice-versa; not one race over another: Did they not read????
"And amongst his signs is the creation of heaven and the earth, and variation in your language and colours; Verily, in there are signs for those who know" (Al-Quran, Chapter 30, Verse 22)
What have we taken from the teachings...what have we learned? What have we done with all our wisdom? Absolutely nothing! We have created a pathetic circus of racism, sexism and the ever popular “I am a real Muslim and you’re not...I come from the family of the Prophet...blah blah blah.” This is our legacy?
Thinking that God created this whole planet just for one group of people, is like believing that we are the only beings in the whole universe. Seriously, some people need to get over themselves.
*So tired of it*
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